Start of a New Era
And so, one August evening, after attending a conference on being a supt., I came home and my lovely wife said to me: "I just feel like you have this vision and mission for your career, but not for our family." So I for the first time in my life stated my mission outloud for my family to my wife: "To utilize the skills and abilities that God has blessed me with wherever He wants me to, and that our children would know that is why I do what I do, and they would understand I do it because I am following Him."
That began the deepening of Superstar and I's relationship. (I don't think that is a sentence, but it's my blog.) I went to the Leadership Summit the next day at KCC, and was balling my eyes out for no apparent reason. I felt like he told me NYC, but wasn't really sure what was going on. When I came home and told Superstar what was happening, she had been washing the minivan and also heard New York. Thus this journey began.
Since then, God has really opened our hearts and our minds to the possibility of our family being a part of starting a new church in NYC. Gramercy Park to be specific. We went on an 'urban plunge' the weekend of September 28th with a group of people from our church. Superstar and I both felt like God was calling us to be a part of this movement. Before going, I did feel like God was telling me that he was calling me, but of course being the spiritual GIANT that I am, I kept telling Him to make it clear to me-as if I needed 1,000 signs instead of one. Here are a couple of things that happened on the plunge:
1. God really told me that he loved me. I sat on a bench in Union Square, and felt the presence of God next to me, putting his arms around me, and for the first time in my life it was personal. Maybe he has done this before to me, but I never was open to receive it? I always envied the people that said they 'had a personal relationship' with Him, or 'heard him speak'. I never understood that, at least until that moment on the bench. I'm sure the key is that my pastor's wife, cm2 unlocked the lock that opened the gate to hearing God. She said that before you try to listen, to REALLY confess all of your sins to him. Not just go through the motions, but REALLY give it all to him, and so I did. That's when I felt his presence, and started to understand hearing His voice.
2. As we sat on the plane leaving Laguardia, I sat between two men I don't know. Superstar and I felt that he was calling us, for many reasons, but again, I continued to ask Him to make it clear to me-as if all the things that happened on the plunge weren't enough! I was in the middle of the book wavelength by Petherick. I need to back up in the week for this to make sense. Wednesday, I was on the phone with cb from my men's group. He said something like-"I just want you to know that jb and I are praying for you and Superstar this weekend. I'm not sure why but I was in the shower thinking about you guys going, and a verse that I had not thought about in a while came to me. Matthew 6:19-21-
19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
I thought it odd that he was telling me that, we both recall an awkward moment on the phone. OK, fast forward back to the plane. Sitting in line on the runway waiting to take off. I'm reading wavelength and I stop, look out the window at Manhattan, and say to God-"Are you sure about this? Are you really telling me you want me here? Is this really happening? Am I making all this up in my head?" Etc.....
Then I very clearly hear His voice say to me: "You're leaving home" At that very moment, the plane started moving. Of course, being the GIANT that I am, I started balling my eyes out. Crying out (not verbally, but internally)-I can't do this, I'm not strong enough, I'm too much of a sinner, I'm not worthy, I CAN'T!!
And then the 'peace that transcends all understanding' came over me. The tears were gone. The emotions were comfort and love. I looked back at Manhattan and longed to stay. So I look down at my book where I left off (Yes, this story does actually mesh at the end), and the next thing I read is Matthew 6:19-21:
19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Oh, and by the way, the title of the chapter in the book was 'Confirmation'.
Since then, God has led me to many things on this journey to NYC. More to come....
That began the deepening of Superstar and I's relationship. (I don't think that is a sentence, but it's my blog.) I went to the Leadership Summit the next day at KCC, and was balling my eyes out for no apparent reason. I felt like he told me NYC, but wasn't really sure what was going on. When I came home and told Superstar what was happening, she had been washing the minivan and also heard New York. Thus this journey began.
Since then, God has really opened our hearts and our minds to the possibility of our family being a part of starting a new church in NYC. Gramercy Park to be specific. We went on an 'urban plunge' the weekend of September 28th with a group of people from our church. Superstar and I both felt like God was calling us to be a part of this movement. Before going, I did feel like God was telling me that he was calling me, but of course being the spiritual GIANT that I am, I kept telling Him to make it clear to me-as if I needed 1,000 signs instead of one. Here are a couple of things that happened on the plunge:
1. God really told me that he loved me. I sat on a bench in Union Square, and felt the presence of God next to me, putting his arms around me, and for the first time in my life it was personal. Maybe he has done this before to me, but I never was open to receive it? I always envied the people that said they 'had a personal relationship' with Him, or 'heard him speak'. I never understood that, at least until that moment on the bench. I'm sure the key is that my pastor's wife, cm2 unlocked the lock that opened the gate to hearing God. She said that before you try to listen, to REALLY confess all of your sins to him. Not just go through the motions, but REALLY give it all to him, and so I did. That's when I felt his presence, and started to understand hearing His voice.
2. As we sat on the plane leaving Laguardia, I sat between two men I don't know. Superstar and I felt that he was calling us, for many reasons, but again, I continued to ask Him to make it clear to me-as if all the things that happened on the plunge weren't enough! I was in the middle of the book wavelength by Petherick. I need to back up in the week for this to make sense. Wednesday, I was on the phone with cb from my men's group. He said something like-"I just want you to know that jb and I are praying for you and Superstar this weekend. I'm not sure why but I was in the shower thinking about you guys going, and a verse that I had not thought about in a while came to me. Matthew 6:19-21-
19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
I thought it odd that he was telling me that, we both recall an awkward moment on the phone. OK, fast forward back to the plane. Sitting in line on the runway waiting to take off. I'm reading wavelength and I stop, look out the window at Manhattan, and say to God-"Are you sure about this? Are you really telling me you want me here? Is this really happening? Am I making all this up in my head?" Etc.....
Then I very clearly hear His voice say to me: "You're leaving home" At that very moment, the plane started moving. Of course, being the GIANT that I am, I started balling my eyes out. Crying out (not verbally, but internally)-I can't do this, I'm not strong enough, I'm too much of a sinner, I'm not worthy, I CAN'T!!
And then the 'peace that transcends all understanding' came over me. The tears were gone. The emotions were comfort and love. I looked back at Manhattan and longed to stay. So I look down at my book where I left off (Yes, this story does actually mesh at the end), and the next thing I read is Matthew 6:19-21:
19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
Oh, and by the way, the title of the chapter in the book was 'Confirmation'.
Since then, God has led me to many things on this journey to NYC. More to come....
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