Just up this hill. Then down.

Again as I ran this week, Jesus confirmed to me that He is indeed my workout partner. If I am in an emotional/mental state where I really check out of this world, I can really engage with God on my runs, and it is really cool to worship Him and listen to Him as I sweat and pant and push myself. Unfortunately, the park has a ton of trees down from Hurricane Irene - so typical paths are not quite typical right now. You may think 'oh, i'll run down this trail.' Dead end - tree felled across the path. Turn around, down the next. Nope - felled again. So sometimes when I run, I think - ok, God, which way should I go? A lot like I try to do in my life. Which way? Where do I go? What path do I take? Many times it is really clear to me - many times not so much. So I keep hitting felled trees. And I make the correlation between my run and my life. (If you've followed me for a while, you are saying to yourself - "Um. Capital Duh T$. Capital Duh.") So truth be told, I completely LOVE my new job/role. It is working from home, which I wouldn't say I'm struggling to balance, just adjusting. After working in a school for 16 + years, you get into a rythym. A rythym of life, the time of the school year, the seasons that come and go. For me, it has been a lot of learning and growing in 15 years, but I would hope I have a pretty good grasp of how to handle the seasons, the challenges, serve others in a school, etc. But that equates to a certain level of comfort that I have gotten used to. New style work is not that high level of comfort. Not the routine that I have become accustomed to. Don't take this wrong - it is GOOD. Just different, and I am still adjusting. But I digress. I LOVE my new role, but it is stretching me - I feel the stretch in not really having that same level of comfort I have become accustomed to. The stretching is good - I know that I have to rely on God to help me see things I don't see/know how to do. I pray daily that He would guide my mouth and my work. Some of the things I have to do are beyond my set of skills - beyond my knowledge pocket. So I must rely on Him. Funny how that is what He always wanted me to do, and I am starting to get it. So back to the run, right? Running - talking with God about all the things I just mentioned - praying in a BIG way that this would turn into a full time position after this year. (Please do add that to your prayer list, would you?) And then I question myself - why am I worried about after this year? Is this normal? For me to worry like this? I am not curled up in a ball sucking my thumb, but just in the background - is this going to go on past this year? Is that normal for me to process ongoing? Is it Satan trying to get a foothold? Still waiting for the jury to reassemble on that front. Let me know if you hear anything, would you? But then I ask - ok, God which way do I run? Just up this hill. Then down. Um. What? Just up this hill then down. Ok, so I run up the hill. Then down. Another turn. Just up this hill. Then down. Now the humor show starts....'Tonight's guest....T$! Ok, God. I get it. Just run up this hill of work this year. Then down. We'll see where to go after that. Just up this hill. Then down.

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