My Communication Arsenal

Let’s be honest, we all have moments of glory when we are communicating with others, and moments of incredible fall on your face failure.  I for one have always thought I was a relatively good communicator, and my perspective was that I could effectively communicate and engage with a variety of people from different cultures, backgrounds, ethnicity, upbringing, or what have you.  I have been a teacher, coach, assistant principal, principal, leadership development consultant, school improvement coach/facilitator, and done these things in a variety of areas in suburbia, rural districts, and even in Detroit, Flint, and Brooklyn. 

But today, I came across this word arsenal.  I felt as if I was walking down the street of life and a sign with this word was in my path and I walked my face right into it – you know the videos you see online when someone doesn’t see the sign before they run their head into it?  And it was painful.  The pain came from the realization that I have an arsenal of communication tools at my disposal – and must choose to access my arsenal.  One definition of arsenal is: “an array of resources available for a certain purpose”.  I have spent over a year really focusing myself, my brain, and my abilities on this array of resources I have available for the purpose of communication in the following ways:

·       Listen to people.  I mean REALLY listen.  Hear what they are saying, how they are saying it, why they are saying it the way they do, and by doing all of this to hear the person they are coming out of their communication.

·       See people.  Particularly the marginalized.  Not just see them visually, but take in what I see in them – and not just their physical structure, but see the person inside of them, see how they were wonderfully and beautifully made.  See how they are wired to do great things, and to see them in ways I have not seen people before

·       Know people.  By doing the above, truly having a good image of this incredible human being that (I believe) God has created in His own image to do good work.  To know others in such a way that I grow to love them – or grow to love them more because I am listening and seeing the awesomeness inside of them. 

Back to arsenal – I have been working diligently to grow my own capacity in what we affectionately call Adaptive Communication.  (This is based on the work of Dr. Tabi Kahler in developing PCM-Process Communication Model.)  So when I ran my face into the sign today, it took me a moment to refocus my eyes and understand what this sign meant.  It meant I indeed do have an arsenal of tools – and I am so very thankful to be learning about what I have in my arsenal.  I must choose not weapons from my arsenal that tear others down, but the tools in my arsenal that build others up.  The tools in my collection that encourage them to be the best them they can be, to meet others’ needs through my selection of communication weapons, to charge others’ batteries and affirm who I hear, see, and know. 

Go.  Run into your own sign.  Open your arsenal and use the great tools you have at your disposal to help yourself guide others to success.  I dare you.