Life is Precious.

It is amazing to me the sense of refreshment I feel this summer in my soul - the renewing of my mind and spirit that I feel is upon me.  The last couple of years I suppose I didn't realize the valley that I was in - just how much I was leaning on God to get me through some challenging days.  Don't get me wrong - it was not all dread and gloom.  Moving back to LO and MI in many ways brought new joy and life to me and God clearly opened my eyes to simple things that I should appreciate so much more than I ever have.  Waking up is one thing.  What a gift each day we have is!  This year, my friend BG has had open heart surgery, was not able to work, and was in and out of the hospital.  Standing by his side in a hospital was such a difficult thing, and his wife is an incredible lady that has been an encouragement and testament to what marriage is about for me.  Knowing that my great friend actually died and was not even able to speak at one point was real life - and sucked.  I had flashbacks to my mother and her struggle with the C, her pain and inability to get her body to do what her mind wanted, and ultimately, her death.  I praise God that BG is EVEN ALIVE today - and what a miracle God has brought him through.  The fact that God created his brain and his body for HIS purpose and plan - and that BG is still here to fulfill that purpose and plan = precious.  What an honor that I even get to be a part of that, witness God's gracious hand at work, and honestly, it just overwhelms me that I get to be friends with the G's and watch their children grow.  I spent many a day during the entire ordeal weeping - just sitting by myself overcome with emotions that make my body shudder in sadness, tears uncontrolled, snot running out of my nose, and physically and mentally on my knees begging God not to take my friend just yet.  Precious.  That is precious time because in these moments, I know I am completely submitted to His will - knowing that even if he had taken BG when I wasn't prepared - that it would be ok.  That life is still precious, and that He is weeping next to me holding my hand, putting me into His might palm and comforting me, like a friend reminded me this week in Psalm 91 - that He covers me with His feathers and that my refuge is under His wings.  I have wanted to blog my thoughts and emotions around BG and what he has meant to not only my life, but the lives of so many.  He is one of the most compassionate, caring people that God has ever brought into my life - and even in the midst of his struggle in connecting all of his memory dots - I was able to see these attributes that clearly God created in him.  Life is certainly precious - and so is my BG.