Happy Blogiversary To T$

Today marks the two year point on the timeline of this blog distributing mustart seeds across the airwaves. To me, it seems like this journey to NYC has been longer than two years + a few months. It seems like the journey has been happening for more like five years or ten years, and I am not really sure why that is. Maybe because what now seems 'normal' to me leads me to aplace of comfort and peace that transcends time and space. Maybe because I am not encapsulated into thinking like the world thinks. Maybe because I am finally seeking what I should seek, and living the way God designed me to live.

Let's not get carried away with our thoughts, because I am not living the perfect life. I am currently under a struggle of selfishness and selectively choosing to turn my eyes from God. Why is it that I know what is right, and I choose to sprint down the path going in the other direction? Into the darkness and out of the light? I choose to dishonor God even though I know it is wrong to think the thoughts I have, to engage in things I know are unhealthy, and to put Jesus on the pause button until I satisfy my selfishness? It is so hard to live in this broken world and not get caught up in it. But the waves of refreshment and forgiveness keep hitting my shore, and taking my sin out to sea.

This morning as I read Luke 23, verses hit me as Jesus was making his way to Golgotha, the place of the skull, to die so that you and I might live life, and live it to the full. The women that were following him were weeping. Jesus said:
"For if men do these things when the tree is green, what will happen when it is dry?"
I felt like he was speaking directly to me. If I am turning my head when my leaves are so green, what will happen when my tree is dry and dying? And so I pray that God helps me to focus on the prize. To hear AND RESPOND to the Holy Spirit when I am convicted of my selfishness, and my choices to walk into the darkness. And I am thankful that God promises power and strength to come to me when I submit my desires in humility, and he pours his grace over me in all that I do.

Comments

Anonymous said…
powerful. Keep thinking on this above!..

tmp
December 3, 2009 at 3:45 PM
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